Thank you to everyone who has been reading my blog, I am overwhelmed with the responses I've received via email, phone and messages. Also, the responses I've received on here. I appreciate the love and support from everyone! It is really hard to share this with people who know me, it is much easier to talk to strangers. I feel very vulnerable this way, but, having all of the support has made it easier.
Today and yesterday have been difficult days for many reasons. Things have been extremely stressful lately, there was a really bad hit yesterday that has my emotions all over the board. I took a dive on my healthy eating and I WILL go right back to healthy eating again. It just wasn't as much "fun" as it used to be either. It's sad how important food is to me. I can definitely feel that I've abused my body, and I don't like the feeling. I have got exercise the past couple of days, so, I guess that is good at least.
I find myself wanting to turn to some other means to appease myself when I can't eat. That disturbs me a lot. During the time I was exclusively juicing, I would desperately want something else to abuse myself with. If I could have drank, I would have. I know I have an addictive personality. I always say I wish I could be addicted to exercise or working in the yard or something that would benefit myself and others. But, even if that were so...I'd still have an addiction.
So, I'm almost there on my Psychology degree and I still haven't figured myself out yet. Geesh. Will I ever? I'm a work in progress. I'm looking forward to feeling better tomorrow and getting back on track. The instant gratification of eating just didn't do it for me like it used to. I guess that's good.
I am running on only a few hours of sleep, sleep that was frequently interrupted too. So, I need to get to bed. Thank you so much everyone for all of your support!